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User blog:Alligator Andy/Baldi vs Agent 47 Epic Rap Battle by Me
Hey guys I'm back again, hope you didn't miss me too much! I was just sitting at lunch today trying to think of a good new epic rap battle when I started thinking about Baldi and how fun he would be to write. Then who do I think of but Agent 47! Crazy right? Here we go, two of the most famous bald and scary video game characters out there! EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY BALDI VERSUS AGENT 47 BEGIN Baldi: Class is in session now, that is, if you have the balls, I'd say run while you can, but there will be no running in the halls! I'm teaching you a lesson, one you won't forget; Your games are some of the worst things I've played yet! They're Absolute shit, I'd rather play Assassin's Creed, Or better yet teach kids the joys of math and how to read! You've been a bad agent in my class, you can go right to detention, Or else you'll put on the trenchcoat because the other students don't give you attention. Agent 47: I found my next target, here is the one I have to slay; A big lipped nobody only known for being flavor of the month horror in May Your game is only played by internet losers with awful commentary And the concepts just "Oh no! Innocent thing isnt innocent! How scary!" Baldi's Basically braindead, but barely beats his baby fanbase in brains Seriously, this cliched excuse for horror is really what entertains? I'd kill the shit out of kids like that, maybe because I'm that depressed, So don't come to school tomorrow, cuz I'll make Columbine look like recess! Baldi: Now now, this type of behavior is not welcome in a school enviroment, man Words can solve any problem better than any sort of firearm can! Crazed armed miffed teens with AR-15s, is this really the future our country needs? Wouldn't it be better to promote love to all (except Republicans) and legalize the weeds? Seriously though the gun control laws in this country are fucking whack It's just okay for a cop to walk up to a black man and shoot him in the back. Now put the weapon down, edgy threats like that don't get a laugh from me, Besides, Sandy Hook is by far the more terrible school shooting tragedy! Agent 47: That's the LAST STRAW! YOU'VE DONE IT! YOU PUSHED ME TOO FAR! Nobody understands me! And they don't understand my right to bear arms! All the kids make fun of me, and I've had enough of it god damn it! So what better way to vent my rage than going to the school to Viet-nam it? If they didn't bully me Baldi, I wouldn't have to bullet them Baldi! Calling me names because I failed to ask out Molly! My lifes a fucking joke, and I just want to take out my anger at the Earth Fuck it all, I hate my mother, I wish she and dad had just never given birth. Baldi: Look man I get that you are going through a very tough time, Look man I get that you had to let it all out in words that rhyme, But we're here for you man, it's going to be okay, I would give you a hug, but man that's kind of gay. Agent 47: Thank you Baldi, I needed to hear that kind of thing today I'd hug you back, but you are right, men hugging is very gay. I'll put away my AK, dump the shotgun I didn't pump But in 2020 I still hope that I can vote for Donald Trump. Baldi: NO TRUMP VOTERS IN MY CLASS YOU ARE EXPELLED! Agent 47: OH NO! I'M SORRY BALDI! PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME TO HELL! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE? EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! Category:Blog posts